Friendship is one of God’s sweetest gifts—but also one of life’s most complicated blessings.
As I look back on my journey, especially in these slower, more intentional years, I’ve seen how friendships change, evolve, and sometimes fade altogether. And that’s not always a bad thing.
Some friends come into our lives for a season—a specific time when we need their presence, wisdom, or companionship. Others remain, becoming anchors in our storms and witnesses to our joys.
But some? Some are harder to classify. And honestly, I’ve realized that not every relationship deserves the label of “friendship.”
Over the years, I’ve had friendships that drained me—emotionally, spiritually, and even socially. Some pulled me down instead of lifting me up. A few were full of that “love-hate” tension—where you never quite know where you stand. And sadly, some were just plain phony. I’ve met people in churches who acted close on Sundays, but once I left that church, I never heard from them again.
It’s painful. And it’s real.
But over time—and with God’s help—I’ve learned this: You can love people without keeping them close. You can forgive someone and still release them from your life.
Here are some red flags to watch for in friendships:
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You’re always the one initiating or giving.
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You leave interactions feeling small or anxious.
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They make you feel guilty for setting boundaries.
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There’s gossip, manipulation, or spiritual pride.
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They disappear when you go through hard seasons—or leave a church.
Lysa TerKeurst, in her book reminds us that protecting your peace isn’t selfish—it’s godly. She says, “Boundaries aren’t just a good idea—they’re a God idea.”
And I believe that with my whole heart.
God calls us to friendship that is honest, safe, mutual, and anchored in love. Proverbs 27:17 says, “As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.”
So if you’re re-evaluating relationships right now, it doesn’t mean you’re being harsh or unkind. It means you’re growing.
🤍 Some friends are for a reason.
🤍 Some for a season.
🤍 And a few are for life.
May God give you wisdom—and the courage to choose peace.