Whenever we go through difficult trials in life, it’s natural to ask:
Why, God?
I’ve asked that question many times since my daughter’s cancer diagnosis. I think anyone who loves deeply and watches someone suffer has. But in the quiet moments—when I’m not trying to fix it or figure it out—I’ve noticed something:
God is doing something.
Romans 8:28 has echoed in my heart over and over again.
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.”
So I’ve started looking for the good—not in a forced, fake-positive kind of way, but in an honest, eyes-wide-open way. And here’s what I see:
My Priorities Have Changed
When someone you love is in a fight for their life, so many of the things you used to worry about just fall away. The little things I used to stress over? They don’t matter anymore.
I keep thinking of the phrase: Nothing else matters.
It’s actually the title of a song (I don’t even know what it’s really about), but those three words have stuck with me. Because they’re true.
When life hits hard, you get clarity. And that clarity is a gift.
God Is Refining Me
Watching my daughter walk through this with such courage has given me a new perspective—not just on life, but on people.
She has been brave as she rocks her nearly bald head, but the looks she sometimes receives from others are hard to witness. And it has made me realize something about myself.
There have been times when I judged others by their appearance. Times I made quick assumptions. I hate to admit that, but it’s true.
And now? I see how wrong that was. Because we really don’t know someone’s story. We can’t tell from the outside what battles a person is facing. God is gently revealing that to me. And I’m thankful.
Book Recommendation
If you’re walking through a season that feels uncertain or overwhelming, one book I highly recommend is You Can Trust God to Write Your Story by Robert and Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth. It’s a beautiful reminder that even when life doesn’t make sense, God is still writing a story filled with redemption, purpose, and hope. This book has encouraged me deeply—especially in this season—and I believe it will bless you too.
(This is an affiliate link, which means I may earn a small commission if you choose to purchase, at no extra cost to you. Thank you for supporting The Redeemed Mess.)
He’s Not Finished With Me
This season is refining me. It’s uncomfortable at times, but it’s also holy.
And God promises that He will complete the work He began in us.
“He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 1:6
So if you’re walking through something hard right now, let me encourage you:
Look for what God is doing in you. Ask Him to show you.
He is faithful.
He is present.
And He is working.
Even when we don’t understand it all.
Even when the pain is fresh.
Even when we feel tired, raw, or afraid.
Nothing else matters—except what He’s doing in us and through us.
Take what you need.
Leave the rest.
Be blessed.
With love and grace,
Kathy